Thirty-Seven
I am now thirty-seven years old; I achieved this incredibly uninteresting milestone on Sunday. For some reason, turning thirty-seven has given me great pause. Turning thirty really didn’t bother me, it just felt weird saying it, the way it felt coming out of my mouth, just a different feeling than twenty-something. Turning thirty-five was a little different as it meant moving out of that coveted eighteen to thirty-four demographic. However, for some reason, turning thirty-seven seemed to really stick in my craw.
I don’t think it’s so much that I feel “old” as it is that I feel “older,” if that makes any sense. I think what keeps me from feeling old is that I don’t have interests that associate with being old, whether that’s true or not in reality, is of course up for debate. I love comic books and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and music and standup comedy and preparing and eating food. My non-work wardrobe is made up of jeans, cargo shorts, hoodies, & t-shirts. Most of my t-shirts either reference BJJ, comics, or bands. This is not in an effort to cling to my youth, this is what I like & what I am comfortable in.
What I have found harder to hold on to or to attain as I have gotten older is physical fitness. When I started training in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu almost five years ago I was overweight and out of shape. Through changes in diet a ton of cardio and as much BJJ I could fit in I shed roughly forty pounds. I have noticed in recent months that I was starting to gain a bit of weight, not a ton, but enough for me to take my most slim fitting or clingy material comprised t-shirts temporarily out of rotation. My biggest roadblock has always been my love of food. I really do love to eat and most of what I love to eat is not very good for you. I try to restrict what I eat during the day during the week, but a lot of times my habits go to hell in a hand basket on the weekends.
In an effort to combat this I have added a three times weekly “core shredding workout” provided by a friend who is a personal trainer and attending a Bikram Yoga class once a week to my work out schedule. I have also started drinking roughly 160 ounces of water a day to combat any water retention. I am also trying to grill as much as possible and to limit eating out and desserts. I am hoping the end result will be a flatter stomach, stronger core, stronger lower back, and increased flexibility. I’m only in my second week of this new program, so time will tell.
The other thing that has started to eat away at me is the question of; what am I going to do with the rest of my life. In all sense of the term, I think it is very safe to say that I have entered what is known as “middle age.” How is my life going to go from here, what do I want to do with the time that I have left? Where do I want to go, what do I want to see and do? Am I doing the most to ensure that the second half will be better than the first? There are so many places I want to see and so many things I have yet to experience. I certainly didn’t think I would be where I am at this point in my life when I was; say my fourteen year old daughter’s age. In some ways I have seen and experienced so much more than I thought that I would, in others, I’m quite disappointed in myself, if I’m honest.
So many unanswered and unanswerable questions dog me regarding what comes next, so much so that it has almost paralyzed me when I try to wrap my head around it all. This is of course the entirely worst possible thing, to be so frozen that one does nothing. I am trying to keep what I have attempted to make my motto since my Father’s passing stay front and center in my mind; be better. Every year my New Year’s Resolution is the same; be better, be a better husband, father, son, friend, martial artist, PERSON. At the end of every year I always feel that I have failed in this quest. That maybe I have moved the needle the slightest bit, but how woefully inadequate of change that is. Every year I say the same; Be Better Tour (insert year here,) train keeps a rollin’, tougher than a coffin nail. And in my heart of hearts I believe this, I believe that I will be better and do better and grow. It just doesn’t seem to work out that way. I know the blame for this falls squarely on my shoulders. I know that I am the sole reason that I am so disappointed in myself.
So here I am, thirty-seven, with so much more to see and do, with half a life left to go. So now what, what comes next? I just don’t know yet. And
that, that is what is making thirty-seven so different, so difficult, that I
just don’t know what should or will come next.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Becoming a Man, what it means to be a Father
With Father’s Day rapidly approaching I’ve been thinking a
lot regarding what it really means to be a Father and when you really become a
man. I don't think I really became a man until my Dad died which is sad and
stupid and fucked up, but that’s the way it is, if I’m being honest, which I’m
trying to be.
One of my favorite examples to give, when people ask what
being a Father means, or of how my Dad was is the time I moved to New Jersey. I
was 18 years old and dating a woman who was 22 and I was totally and completely
infatuated with her. She had already graduated college and I was halfway
through my first year and not doing a very good job of it. I was too involved
with going to goth clubs with my friends and exploring the NYC goth scene to do
things like go to class and write papers.
I dropped out of school because it was interfering with
spending time with her and with my working shit menial jobs to make money to
move in with her. She eventually got kicked out of her place up in Port Chester
and moved back in with her mother in South Jersey. I would work all week at
Costco, then take the LIRR into Penn, walk to Port Authority and take the two
hour bus trip down to Cherry Hill every Friday, spend the rest of Friday and
all of Saturday with her and be back in NY in time to work the closing shift on
Sunday. It totally fucking sucked.
We started looking for places together and everywhere in
North Jersey or NY was too expensive. All the way my Father kept trying to talk
me out of moving in with her and into going back to college. I wouldn’t listen
and we argued often. We eventually found a place in South Jersey and were committed
to moving in together. Despite their misgivings, my parents helped me pack, rented
a minivan, and drove me down there. Once down there they took us to Bed, Bath,
& Beyond and bought some things for us. We said our goodbyes and they were
off.
While I was there, my Dad would send me care packages; video
tapes of Giants games (when they won), and news clippings pertaining to the Giants,
and any news clippings pertaining to the Islanders. He would call me often, not
to hound me, but to keep in touch. When things started going bad he tried to
council me.
Finally, it was at a point when things were not going to get
better and he said “Christopher, just come home, I’ll take the for sale sign of
your car, all you have to do is go to school. Just come home.” When I finally
agreed, he again rented a minivan, drove down to South Jersey, helped me pack,
and took me home.
Being a parent is trying to prevent your children from
making mistakes, realizing when you can’t stop them, and being there to help
them stand up, and dust themselves off when they do. He never rubbed it in my
face, he never hit me with an “I told you so,” he just told me how proud he was
of me for realizing my mistake and coming home. And how happy he was I was home and how much
he loved me. He even repainted my room and had my Mom get me new curtains and
bedding.
I would make a lot more mistakes and he would do
a lot more helping me up and dusting me off. He was the BEST, end of story and I'll
never measure up, and I'm cool with that. But he loved me so much; he never
gave up on me. He was the only one, other than Erin, who never gave up. And it
took him dying, for me to really fully become the man he saw in me. What I’m
not cool with is him being gone and I’m not OK with him not getting to see the
man I’ve become. I love you Dad, with all my heart, always and forever.
Friday, May 10, 2013
Having an incredible memory, a blessing or a curse?
My friends and family will often remark on my incredible powers of recall. I have a very, very good long term memory, especially when it concerns social situations. Without much effort I am usually able to recall minute details from as far back as my childhood. And I remember nonsensical things like what I wore on first dates in high school that never even resulted in second dates. My mind is filled with useless recollections of specific episodes of 80s sitcoms.
Oscar Hammling uttered one of my dear friend Chris Gavagan’s favorite quotes, “Often the greatest enemy of present happiness is past happiness too well remembered.” Chris repeated this quote to me often over many a cup of coffee at the infamous El Greco Diner in Brooklyn. It related both to a wonderful script he had written as well as both of our lives. I have often focused on this quote and on the veracity of it.
If you are truly happy in the present, can remembering how happy you were in the past really be enough to derail that happiness? Well, let’s examine this shall we? I am certainly willing to accept the fact that one’s memory is indeed subjective. And that how you remember something, doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s the truth of the matter. I could wholly and completely believe that I wasn’t happier than I had ever been at one point in time, but in truth, maybe there were events surrounding said point in time, that were causing me extreme anxiety? Maybe that MOMENT was wonderful, but the surrounding moments were horrible.
Now, if a person is happy, in the moment & place they are currently in, why would a memory of another time in which they are happy, ruin that? Well, perhaps it’s because you’ll think “I’m having a great time right now, I’m so happy, life is good!” And then you’ll think, “Well, it’s not as good as…” and this is what leads to problems, the comparisons.
These comparisons are often not anywhere near the realm of being fair due to the previously stated subjective nature of one’s memory. The odds are already slanted in favor of past happiness, due to the fact that you are subjectively remembering them. Then you work into the equation that you are older than the time you are remembering and in most cases ones responsibilities, stresses, and obligations increase with age. Another point for past happiness!
So here you are, concentrating on how good things were back then which in turn leads you to think of how much better than they are at the present moment. This can run you down into thinking that if things were so good then, that means they aren’t all that great now, and this totally kills your buzz on your present happiness. And BOOM there we have it, present happiness crushed by the oppressive heel of past happiness.
I have to admit, I have fallen victim to this many, many times. It has ruined many relationships and other opportunities for me in my lifetime. However, all things considered, I wouldn’t trade my memory for anything.
My Father has been gone for over 4 ½ years now, and I have many amazing memories of him. There are little moments between just the two of us as well as the big moments surrounded by others. Do my past memories of times spent with him make new memories of life events and achievements without him pale in comparison? Sometimes, sometimes it does, and I always wish he could be a part of them. I have learned, however, that I have to live in the moment and be thankful for the happiness I have & grateful for the good times I will experience in the future and not shackle myself to my past.
Oscar Hammling uttered one of my dear friend Chris Gavagan’s favorite quotes, “Often the greatest enemy of present happiness is past happiness too well remembered.” Chris repeated this quote to me often over many a cup of coffee at the infamous El Greco Diner in Brooklyn. It related both to a wonderful script he had written as well as both of our lives. I have often focused on this quote and on the veracity of it.
If you are truly happy in the present, can remembering how happy you were in the past really be enough to derail that happiness? Well, let’s examine this shall we? I am certainly willing to accept the fact that one’s memory is indeed subjective. And that how you remember something, doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s the truth of the matter. I could wholly and completely believe that I wasn’t happier than I had ever been at one point in time, but in truth, maybe there were events surrounding said point in time, that were causing me extreme anxiety? Maybe that MOMENT was wonderful, but the surrounding moments were horrible.
Now, if a person is happy, in the moment & place they are currently in, why would a memory of another time in which they are happy, ruin that? Well, perhaps it’s because you’ll think “I’m having a great time right now, I’m so happy, life is good!” And then you’ll think, “Well, it’s not as good as…” and this is what leads to problems, the comparisons.
These comparisons are often not anywhere near the realm of being fair due to the previously stated subjective nature of one’s memory. The odds are already slanted in favor of past happiness, due to the fact that you are subjectively remembering them. Then you work into the equation that you are older than the time you are remembering and in most cases ones responsibilities, stresses, and obligations increase with age. Another point for past happiness!
So here you are, concentrating on how good things were back then which in turn leads you to think of how much better than they are at the present moment. This can run you down into thinking that if things were so good then, that means they aren’t all that great now, and this totally kills your buzz on your present happiness. And BOOM there we have it, present happiness crushed by the oppressive heel of past happiness.
I have to admit, I have fallen victim to this many, many times. It has ruined many relationships and other opportunities for me in my lifetime. However, all things considered, I wouldn’t trade my memory for anything.
My Father has been gone for over 4 ½ years now, and I have many amazing memories of him. There are little moments between just the two of us as well as the big moments surrounded by others. Do my past memories of times spent with him make new memories of life events and achievements without him pale in comparison? Sometimes, sometimes it does, and I always wish he could be a part of them. I have learned, however, that I have to live in the moment and be thankful for the happiness I have & grateful for the good times I will experience in the future and not shackle myself to my past.
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Return of the BLOG (Where I’ve been, what I’m up to, & what to expect here)
I know, I know, I’m horrible. My last post on here was April 7, 2010, which is now over three years ago. So many things have happened since my last post that I almost do not know where to begin, for anyone who happens across this blog and is not an immediate acquaintance of mine. Which I also know is highly unlikely. Why the hell would anyone who does not know me or at least know of me be reading this blog? Well, I suppose, just in case, I should just do a quick catching up, a la Depeche Mode in 1985.
The first significant thing was that I left the hospital I had worked at in August of 2010. The second significant event was that on August 21, 2010 at the 2nd Annual Team Serra BBQ, I was promoted to the level of Blue Belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu by Senseis Matt & Nick Serra. It was an amazing experience and one of the proudest moments of my life. I am so glad that both my wife & daughter were there to experience it with me.
Soon after, I decided that I was going to pursue one of my great passions in life, baking. I enrolled in the Institute of Culinary Education’s Pastry & Baking Arts program. I learned from some incredibly amazing chefs that I will forever be indebted to: Jeff Yoskowitz, Sim Cass, Scott McMillen, and Chad Pagano. I worked very hard, studied a lot and graduated with high honors.
I interned at a cupcake shop and then worked there for a while and the amount of pay and the number of hours I was getting were just not where I needed them to be to help my wife support our family. We decided to start Put It In Your Face (https://www.facebook.com/PutItInYourFace) an internet based bakery. Things were going well during the holidays and dropped off pretty hard in the summer and we just weren’t pulling in enough consistent clientele and didn’t have the start up for a store front or food truck. Either of which would have greatly benefited our product.
In the summer of 2012 I realized that the business was, unfortunately, going to have to become a side project and that I would have to find full time employment elsewhere. I worked as a merchandiser for Kellogg’s for about five months, stocking supermarket shelves with cookies, crackers, and granola bars. Setting up and breaking down displays and my back (figuratively) in the process.
Then in December of this year, with the help of a good friend’s wife, I was able to land a job as an office manager in Chelsea. And here I am, five months later, writing this blog. I know, not exactly in the culinary or entertainment field. Well, about that, here’s the thing; I have a wife, a daughter, two dogs, a mortgage, and two cars. I think it’s safe to assume you can see where I am getting at with this.
However, I am still training in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (not as often as I would like but I still average twice a week,) I still have Put It In Your Face, I’m still dragging my wife all over to check out places to eat, and here I am, writing. And I am going to endeavor to do a lot more writing from now on. As well as what you will find here, I am an occasional contributor over at www.burgerweekly.com (you can find past pieces from here: http://www.burgerweekly.com/tag/christopher ) and whenever they post me there I will link to it on here.
I’m going to have to backtrack a bit here because another thing that I definitely need to mention is that back in the late 80s I was really into comic books, mostly Batman. Once I started High School, I got away from collecting and all my comics and graphic novels sat in a box in the crawl space of my parent house and then my attic. Well, DC Comics decided that on August 31, 2011 they would restart all their series over to issue #1 with many titles having a completely revamped continuity. My good friend Chris Brady decided that it would be an excellent time to jump back into comics. At first I laughed, asked him if he was kidding and then was gently persuaded to pick up Justice League #1. And that’s all it took, I read more titles now than I ever did as a kid. I follow quite a few titles on a monthly basis and through trade paper backs have caught up on quite a few awesome tales that I missed while I was away.
I love comics and I really need to thank Chris for getting me back into them and I also really need to thank Zach and Tommy of the most awesome local comic shop there is, Best Comics International in New Hyde Park, NY. They have been nothing but cool to me since I first walked through their door, welcoming me with open arms, making suggestions, but not pushing anything on me, and answering any questions I might have. What an awesome crew over there! I definitely urge you to check out their web site: http://www.bestcomics.com/index.html , and if you’re in the area, you need to hit their store!
OK, so I think I covered the where I’ve been and what I’m up to. I think all that’s left is to tell you what to expect here. To state the obvious, this is my blog and I’m going to write about the things that I dig: Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, baking, cooking, eating out, MMA, music, film, books, comics, stand-up comedy, television, and whatever else I happen to feel like running my mouth about. You will occasionally find short stories, poetry, memoirs, and lyrics by yours truly here.
Feel free to comment on here and you can also follow me over on twitter @huntingforjoy where I will drop a link whenever the blog is updated. I promise that I am going to do my best to blog as often as possible, about as much as possible. Thanks for reading.
The first significant thing was that I left the hospital I had worked at in August of 2010. The second significant event was that on August 21, 2010 at the 2nd Annual Team Serra BBQ, I was promoted to the level of Blue Belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu by Senseis Matt & Nick Serra. It was an amazing experience and one of the proudest moments of my life. I am so glad that both my wife & daughter were there to experience it with me.
Soon after, I decided that I was going to pursue one of my great passions in life, baking. I enrolled in the Institute of Culinary Education’s Pastry & Baking Arts program. I learned from some incredibly amazing chefs that I will forever be indebted to: Jeff Yoskowitz, Sim Cass, Scott McMillen, and Chad Pagano. I worked very hard, studied a lot and graduated with high honors.
I interned at a cupcake shop and then worked there for a while and the amount of pay and the number of hours I was getting were just not where I needed them to be to help my wife support our family. We decided to start Put It In Your Face (https://www.facebook.com/PutItInYourFace) an internet based bakery. Things were going well during the holidays and dropped off pretty hard in the summer and we just weren’t pulling in enough consistent clientele and didn’t have the start up for a store front or food truck. Either of which would have greatly benefited our product.
In the summer of 2012 I realized that the business was, unfortunately, going to have to become a side project and that I would have to find full time employment elsewhere. I worked as a merchandiser for Kellogg’s for about five months, stocking supermarket shelves with cookies, crackers, and granola bars. Setting up and breaking down displays and my back (figuratively) in the process.
Then in December of this year, with the help of a good friend’s wife, I was able to land a job as an office manager in Chelsea. And here I am, five months later, writing this blog. I know, not exactly in the culinary or entertainment field. Well, about that, here’s the thing; I have a wife, a daughter, two dogs, a mortgage, and two cars. I think it’s safe to assume you can see where I am getting at with this.
However, I am still training in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (not as often as I would like but I still average twice a week,) I still have Put It In Your Face, I’m still dragging my wife all over to check out places to eat, and here I am, writing. And I am going to endeavor to do a lot more writing from now on. As well as what you will find here, I am an occasional contributor over at www.burgerweekly.com (you can find past pieces from here: http://www.burgerweekly.com/tag/christopher ) and whenever they post me there I will link to it on here.
I’m going to have to backtrack a bit here because another thing that I definitely need to mention is that back in the late 80s I was really into comic books, mostly Batman. Once I started High School, I got away from collecting and all my comics and graphic novels sat in a box in the crawl space of my parent house and then my attic. Well, DC Comics decided that on August 31, 2011 they would restart all their series over to issue #1 with many titles having a completely revamped continuity. My good friend Chris Brady decided that it would be an excellent time to jump back into comics. At first I laughed, asked him if he was kidding and then was gently persuaded to pick up Justice League #1. And that’s all it took, I read more titles now than I ever did as a kid. I follow quite a few titles on a monthly basis and through trade paper backs have caught up on quite a few awesome tales that I missed while I was away.
I love comics and I really need to thank Chris for getting me back into them and I also really need to thank Zach and Tommy of the most awesome local comic shop there is, Best Comics International in New Hyde Park, NY. They have been nothing but cool to me since I first walked through their door, welcoming me with open arms, making suggestions, but not pushing anything on me, and answering any questions I might have. What an awesome crew over there! I definitely urge you to check out their web site: http://www.bestcomics.com/index.html , and if you’re in the area, you need to hit their store!
OK, so I think I covered the where I’ve been and what I’m up to. I think all that’s left is to tell you what to expect here. To state the obvious, this is my blog and I’m going to write about the things that I dig: Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, baking, cooking, eating out, MMA, music, film, books, comics, stand-up comedy, television, and whatever else I happen to feel like running my mouth about. You will occasionally find short stories, poetry, memoirs, and lyrics by yours truly here.
Feel free to comment on here and you can also follow me over on twitter @huntingforjoy where I will drop a link whenever the blog is updated. I promise that I am going to do my best to blog as often as possible, about as much as possible. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
A Renewed Passion
It’s been a little over a month since I’ve updated on here so I figured I should probably give it a go. People who have known me for a long time know that baking has always been one of my passions. Yes, yes you read that right, baking. When I was a little boy I would often watch my Mother bake and then began lending a hand as I got older. I liked being around her and all the smells of her kitchen and the wonderful things that would come out of her oven, especially her banana walnut bread and her chocolate Bundt cake with confectionary sugar sprinkled on top.
As I got older I started baking things on my own, mostly from boxed mixes with the occasional banana walnut bread from scratch thrown in. As time passed I started making more and more things from scratch, like my Na Na’s peanut butter cookies or raspberry muffins. When I first met my wife I wooed her with chocolate chip oatmeal cookies and cinnamon streusel cake until she begged me to stop the oven baked onslaught!
In recent years I had gotten away from baking; really only doing it around the holidays. My Dad and older sister Nadine just had to have my homemade cornbread on Thanksgiving and everyone else was always clamoring for Na Na’s peanut butter cookies. However I have recently undergone somewhat of a baking resurgence. And I have to say, my daughter Lyric really deserves most of the credit.
Over the last year or so Lyric has developed a new found obsession with the Food Network and shows like Ace Of Cakes and Cake Boss. As I result I have found myself becoming a fan of Diners, Drive Ins, & Dives, Man vs. Food, The Best Thing I Ever Ate, Good Eats, and Chopped. Through becoming an avid fan of these shows I have subsequently become a fan of Chefs Guy Fieri, Alton Brown, Paula Deen, Michael Symon, and Chris Santos.
Another result of watching these programs has been the stoking of my desire to make the dishes I have seen featured on them. Or to seek out other recipes that I had always wanted to try, but just never attempted. And in doing so, spending time with my wife and daughter doing something we can all enjoy, like making a red velvet cake from scratch or baked macaroni and cheese. I would absolutely love it if my daughter were to become a Chef or Pastry Chef!
My wife has also recently become obsessed with idea of us mastering the art of making our own pizza. Right now getting the crust right is our biggest nemesis! However, we have faith that our recent purchases of both a pizza stone and a pizza peel will aid us in our efforts!
My teammates have also benefitted greatly from my recent culinary adventures as my wife often likes for me to get them out of the house to prevent us from overindulging! Some of my recent conquests have been my Split Decision Layer Cake (Vanilla Cake on top, Chocolate Cake on bottom, milk chocolate icing), chocolate peanut butter cupcakes, donut muffins (my wife says they are the best thing I have ever made and I may be inclined to agree), apple muffins, and a really amazing marinated skirt steak.
Yes, I have been branching out into cooking as well. I had always cooked a few things here and there like fajitas or tacos or chili or the occasional meat loaf, but I am starting to cook more and more. I have printed out a HUGE binder full of recipes for appetizers, main courses, and of course desserts that I want to try.
I have really been enjoying the time I have been spending in the kitchen both with my wife and daughter and on my own. I had almost forgotten how enjoyable it can be to have my music blaring as I try out a new recipe and bounce around the kitchen and then the triumph of a successful attempt at a new dish. I’ve also taken to photographing my culinary adventures, a fact which my Mrs. finds quite amusing I must say. She also thinks it’s incredibly humorous that lately all I can talk about is what new chokes I am trying out or what recipe I want to attempt next!
Again, I must thank my daughter for getting me back in the kitchen and my wife for putting up with my renewed culinary obsession. It has really been extremely rewarding being back in the kitchen and trying out all matter of new things. Tonight I’ll be going with an old standby, my Mom’s famous banana walnut bread!
As I got older I started baking things on my own, mostly from boxed mixes with the occasional banana walnut bread from scratch thrown in. As time passed I started making more and more things from scratch, like my Na Na’s peanut butter cookies or raspberry muffins. When I first met my wife I wooed her with chocolate chip oatmeal cookies and cinnamon streusel cake until she begged me to stop the oven baked onslaught!
In recent years I had gotten away from baking; really only doing it around the holidays. My Dad and older sister Nadine just had to have my homemade cornbread on Thanksgiving and everyone else was always clamoring for Na Na’s peanut butter cookies. However I have recently undergone somewhat of a baking resurgence. And I have to say, my daughter Lyric really deserves most of the credit.
Over the last year or so Lyric has developed a new found obsession with the Food Network and shows like Ace Of Cakes and Cake Boss. As I result I have found myself becoming a fan of Diners, Drive Ins, & Dives, Man vs. Food, The Best Thing I Ever Ate, Good Eats, and Chopped. Through becoming an avid fan of these shows I have subsequently become a fan of Chefs Guy Fieri, Alton Brown, Paula Deen, Michael Symon, and Chris Santos.
Another result of watching these programs has been the stoking of my desire to make the dishes I have seen featured on them. Or to seek out other recipes that I had always wanted to try, but just never attempted. And in doing so, spending time with my wife and daughter doing something we can all enjoy, like making a red velvet cake from scratch or baked macaroni and cheese. I would absolutely love it if my daughter were to become a Chef or Pastry Chef!
My wife has also recently become obsessed with idea of us mastering the art of making our own pizza. Right now getting the crust right is our biggest nemesis! However, we have faith that our recent purchases of both a pizza stone and a pizza peel will aid us in our efforts!
My teammates have also benefitted greatly from my recent culinary adventures as my wife often likes for me to get them out of the house to prevent us from overindulging! Some of my recent conquests have been my Split Decision Layer Cake (Vanilla Cake on top, Chocolate Cake on bottom, milk chocolate icing), chocolate peanut butter cupcakes, donut muffins (my wife says they are the best thing I have ever made and I may be inclined to agree), apple muffins, and a really amazing marinated skirt steak.
Yes, I have been branching out into cooking as well. I had always cooked a few things here and there like fajitas or tacos or chili or the occasional meat loaf, but I am starting to cook more and more. I have printed out a HUGE binder full of recipes for appetizers, main courses, and of course desserts that I want to try.
I have really been enjoying the time I have been spending in the kitchen both with my wife and daughter and on my own. I had almost forgotten how enjoyable it can be to have my music blaring as I try out a new recipe and bounce around the kitchen and then the triumph of a successful attempt at a new dish. I’ve also taken to photographing my culinary adventures, a fact which my Mrs. finds quite amusing I must say. She also thinks it’s incredibly humorous that lately all I can talk about is what new chokes I am trying out or what recipe I want to attempt next!
Again, I must thank my daughter for getting me back in the kitchen and my wife for putting up with my renewed culinary obsession. It has really been extremely rewarding being back in the kitchen and trying out all matter of new things. Tonight I’ll be going with an old standby, my Mom’s famous banana walnut bread!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Being sick, parental responsibilities, CD eating dogs, philosophy, conversing, ROH’s Seventh Anniversary Show, this is a long one…be warned!
Most people who know me know that I am lucky in that I rarely ever get sick or sick enough to miss time at work. I get injured here and there, but I am rarely sick. Well, that caught up to me this past week as I was hit with one hell of a sinus cold. Bad enough that it forced me to miss work Thursday and Friday and Jiu Jitsu class on Saturday morning. And you know that I had to really be in the shitter to miss Jiu Jitsu class. Hell, I dislocated my shoulder and didn’t miss any classes although I was unable to roll (spar) for several months.
This weekend was a set up to be a very busy one for me. My daughter had her Girl Scouts Holiday Night Performance on Friday night from 8 PM to 10 PM which I could not miss, especially since my Mother had dinner plans with my brother and sister-in-law to celebrate their anniversary and my wife was in AC with a friend for the night. Saturday I had tickets for Ring of Honor’s Seventh Anniversary Show, and Sunday we had tickets to take my daughter to the circus.
Thursday morning I was feeling like death when my alarm went off and I really was having trouble getting up. My head felt so heavy and my throat was killing me. My wife urged me to stay home, especially with the weekend we had ahead, she thought that if I attempted going to work I would get really, really sick. So I called out of work, kissed my wife goodbye, and went back to sleep for about 4 or 5 more hours.
I was awakened by Leia crying at the bedroom door. I instantly knew what it was; our lab Luke has a new hobby, eating my CDs! The room he hangs out includes two large media storage towers, one houses my CD collection and the other houses my DVD collection. Luke has taken to removing CDs from the rack and destroying the cases and in some instances, the CDs themselves. The first victims were several irreplaceable mix CDs that Erin made for me complete with homemade inserts and CD labels. The next victim was my special edition copy of Release by the Pet Shop Boys, followed by a limited edition copy of the Psychedelic Furs Greatest Hits. On this day he had gotten his grubby little paws on Antics by Interpol.
At this point we really do not know what to do about Luke’s new irritating habit. First and foremost he could really hurt himself ingesting the shards of plastic from the cases or the booklets which are stapled together. The secondary concern of course is that I have worked really hard over a period of approximately eighteen years to build this collection and who the hell knows how much money I have spent on it at this point. Many CDs in my collection are from England, Germany, and Japan and many more have tremendous sentimental value. We may have to resort to crating Luke again as he cannot seem to keep out of trouble when left to his own devices.
Alas, back to the busy weekend! So, despite being mostly unconscious for the past two days passing most of the time in my bed with my husky Leia curled up next to me I dragged myself into the shower and then off to the elementary school to catch my daughter’s Girl Scout troop’s presentation of Passover. They did a pretty good job for a bunch of gentiles with my daughter being the only one of the lot with any Jewish blood. She’s a quarter Jewish thanks to my Mom’s side. I sat there for a little over two hours with my head heavy from Dayquil and sinusitis but I made it through, awake. It was then back home where I got Lyric tucked in for bed and headed off to bed myself.
Saturday morning arrived way too quickly for my tastes and it was up and time to get Lyric off to religion class. I decided as I got her up that I was not going to be able to make it to Jiu Jitsu class that day. My head felt like it weighed 50 pounds and I could not breathe through my nose in the slightest. These things are not conducive to a productive class. So, after Lyric’s class I brought her back home and had bagels with her and my Mom and then at my Mom’s insistence it was back to bed for me. Again I slept for several hours. Erin finally made it back home from AC and I was able to spend an hour with her before heading off to the city for a night of ROH action.
Right before the train arrived I bumped into an old friend I had not seen since my first year of college. I had bumped into her on facebook a few months ago but we just befriended each other and that was it. So, we rode into the city together and caught up on what we had been doing and how our lives had gone since we last spoke. It’s always good to run into old friends again and catch up. It’s one of my most favorite things actually.
I met up with my buddy Bob outside the Hammerstein Ballroom and we discussed the night’s show and what we were looking forward to catching that night. Bob was shocked when I did not make my usually pilgrimage to the merchandise table for new DVDs. I explained that I had just booked a trip to Ireland in May and as result wouldn’t be making any purchases. Bob was still shocked at my resolve, especially given the fact that throughout the night ROH kept announcing the buy 3 get 1 free sale they were having!
The first half of the show was incredibly lackluster and had both me and the Bob shaking our heads. The 6 Man Ultimate Endurance between Necro Butcher, Tyler Black and Delirious vs. Jimmy Jacobs, Brodie Lee and Austin Aries was absolutely horrible. The rules were convoluted and ridiculous and many fans found it hard to follow what the stipulations were despite Bobby Cruise announcing them in between falls. And I am getting really tired of Jimmy Jacobs vs everyone who used to be in the Age of the Fall. And on another note, what a crappy group, no one ever stays! Jacobs is the only left from the original quartet of himself, Black, Necro, and Lacey. Delirious was added on and his now out with the group now standing as Jacobs, Brodie Lee, occasionally MsChif, and occasionally Alison Wonderland. And what the hell is with Aries new gimmick? I get the change in attire and attitude, but there is no rule out there that says if you change your gimmick you suddenly forget how to wrestle! It’s cheap heat!
The show picked up steam in the second half with the mystery tag partner match which pitted Bison Smith accompanied by Prince Nana and Dirty Ernie Osiris and the returning Crown Jewel of the Embassy Jimmy Rave against American Dragon Bryan Danielson and the returning Colt “Boom Boom” Cabana. This match really got the crowd into the show as people popped huge for Jimmy’s return and even bigger for the return of Cabana.
D-Lo Brown vs. Jay Briscoe deflated the crowd again as no one was into Brown’s NYC debut and the match was a really crappy one to boot. The no DQ tag title match got people back into things but left me scratching my head. Steen was clearly injured going into the match and yet they didn’t move the belts off them. Hopefully we don’t head into a situation where again the tag champs were injured and they had a chance to move the belts in a match, chose not to, and then stripped them of the belts and had a tournament. I do not want that nonsense again.
We then got Nigel vs. KENTA for the ROH World Title and Nigel came in with his arm heavily taped up. Throughout the match it was terribly obvious that Nigel was really, legitimately injured. I can see why they didn’t move the belt here though; KENTA is a NOAH wrestler, on loan to ROH and cannot be counted on for consistent appearances. However, I do see the belt coming off Nigel sooner rather than later as I believe he is going to need surgery on his often injured arm.
Post show Bob and I headed off to our usual post show meal at the beloved Tick Tock Diner. We discussed Bob’s upcoming move, my trip to Ireland, some funny stories about my past and are doubts about ROH’s current direction under Booker Adam Pearce. As always it was a great time chatting it up with Bob and I look forward to our next show together.
Upon making it back into Penn Station I ran into my old buddy Vujeyva who I know through a friend’s younger brother. I often bump into him at shows as he is a fellow ROH fan. We asked each other what train we were on and when I realized his train was a half hour later than mine, to go to a town 5 minutes away from mine, I offered for him to hop on my train with me and I would give him a ride back to his car. He took me up on the offer and we spent the time conversing about ROH, other wrestling, music, what everyone from the “Group” had been up to, work, and other various topics. It was cool not to take the train by myself for once and I really enjoyed chatting it up with him.
I got home at 1:30 AM, took some Nyquil, and passed out until Erin woke me at 1 PM on Sunday afternoon. She offered repeatedly to take Lyric to the circus on her own but I just couldn’t do that to Lyric. I dragged my ass out of bed and into the shower and got myself dressed. Then Erin informed me that the night before Luke had gotten to one of my all time favorite albums, Ritual De Lo Habitual by Jane’s Addiction. I was completely incensed at this point. Erin blockaded the CD and DVD cases with chairs and a vacuum before we left and then it was off to the circus!
The circus was, well the circus. This is the second time we went in two years and I have to say, it doesn’t do anything for me and I would really not rather go anymore. I would also rather they not subject animals to the bull shit that they do. Both these circus trips have been through the Girl Scouts as I would not have sought to go otherwise.
After the circus we met up with my Mom at the Fred Robster for dinner (Richard Jenni fans will get this) and had an enjoyable meal as a family. Afterwards we dropped Lyric off at her mother’s and headed back home. Thus ending my way too busy a weekend for someone with a ridiculously bad sinus cold.
Before I sign off on this way too long blog, those of you who have been hounding me for an entry have now gotten what you asked for, I thought I would hit on one more thing. I received Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance as a Christmas gift from one of the doctors I work for. I have just recently been able to start reading the book as I received so many books for Christmas this year. And let me tell you, when you have a 90 minute commute to and from work each day, books are always a welcome present! This book can at times be a harrowing read and there have been several instances when I have had to put it down and just focus on the music on my iPod as my head has been spinning a bit. I have to say though; it has made me think of one of my favorite philosophical theories. That is that no man can stand in the same river twice, as both the man and the river are in a constant state of flux. The river will never be the same, and neither will the man.
I often think of the past, way more than I probably should, and change. We may look back on good times we had and good friends we share them with and these friends may no longer be a part or as big a part of our lives as they once were. We should not look back at this with sorrow but with joy at remembering the times we had. We must also remember that we are not that person anymore and neither are they. We should not constantly lament that they may no longer be in our lives but just enjoy the fact that they once were and the times we had with them. Times change, people come and go, but memories last forever.
Thanks for listening to me ramble again.
This weekend was a set up to be a very busy one for me. My daughter had her Girl Scouts Holiday Night Performance on Friday night from 8 PM to 10 PM which I could not miss, especially since my Mother had dinner plans with my brother and sister-in-law to celebrate their anniversary and my wife was in AC with a friend for the night. Saturday I had tickets for Ring of Honor’s Seventh Anniversary Show, and Sunday we had tickets to take my daughter to the circus.
Thursday morning I was feeling like death when my alarm went off and I really was having trouble getting up. My head felt so heavy and my throat was killing me. My wife urged me to stay home, especially with the weekend we had ahead, she thought that if I attempted going to work I would get really, really sick. So I called out of work, kissed my wife goodbye, and went back to sleep for about 4 or 5 more hours.
I was awakened by Leia crying at the bedroom door. I instantly knew what it was; our lab Luke has a new hobby, eating my CDs! The room he hangs out includes two large media storage towers, one houses my CD collection and the other houses my DVD collection. Luke has taken to removing CDs from the rack and destroying the cases and in some instances, the CDs themselves. The first victims were several irreplaceable mix CDs that Erin made for me complete with homemade inserts and CD labels. The next victim was my special edition copy of Release by the Pet Shop Boys, followed by a limited edition copy of the Psychedelic Furs Greatest Hits. On this day he had gotten his grubby little paws on Antics by Interpol.
At this point we really do not know what to do about Luke’s new irritating habit. First and foremost he could really hurt himself ingesting the shards of plastic from the cases or the booklets which are stapled together. The secondary concern of course is that I have worked really hard over a period of approximately eighteen years to build this collection and who the hell knows how much money I have spent on it at this point. Many CDs in my collection are from England, Germany, and Japan and many more have tremendous sentimental value. We may have to resort to crating Luke again as he cannot seem to keep out of trouble when left to his own devices.
Alas, back to the busy weekend! So, despite being mostly unconscious for the past two days passing most of the time in my bed with my husky Leia curled up next to me I dragged myself into the shower and then off to the elementary school to catch my daughter’s Girl Scout troop’s presentation of Passover. They did a pretty good job for a bunch of gentiles with my daughter being the only one of the lot with any Jewish blood. She’s a quarter Jewish thanks to my Mom’s side. I sat there for a little over two hours with my head heavy from Dayquil and sinusitis but I made it through, awake. It was then back home where I got Lyric tucked in for bed and headed off to bed myself.
Saturday morning arrived way too quickly for my tastes and it was up and time to get Lyric off to religion class. I decided as I got her up that I was not going to be able to make it to Jiu Jitsu class that day. My head felt like it weighed 50 pounds and I could not breathe through my nose in the slightest. These things are not conducive to a productive class. So, after Lyric’s class I brought her back home and had bagels with her and my Mom and then at my Mom’s insistence it was back to bed for me. Again I slept for several hours. Erin finally made it back home from AC and I was able to spend an hour with her before heading off to the city for a night of ROH action.
Right before the train arrived I bumped into an old friend I had not seen since my first year of college. I had bumped into her on facebook a few months ago but we just befriended each other and that was it. So, we rode into the city together and caught up on what we had been doing and how our lives had gone since we last spoke. It’s always good to run into old friends again and catch up. It’s one of my most favorite things actually.
I met up with my buddy Bob outside the Hammerstein Ballroom and we discussed the night’s show and what we were looking forward to catching that night. Bob was shocked when I did not make my usually pilgrimage to the merchandise table for new DVDs. I explained that I had just booked a trip to Ireland in May and as result wouldn’t be making any purchases. Bob was still shocked at my resolve, especially given the fact that throughout the night ROH kept announcing the buy 3 get 1 free sale they were having!
The first half of the show was incredibly lackluster and had both me and the Bob shaking our heads. The 6 Man Ultimate Endurance between Necro Butcher, Tyler Black and Delirious vs. Jimmy Jacobs, Brodie Lee and Austin Aries was absolutely horrible. The rules were convoluted and ridiculous and many fans found it hard to follow what the stipulations were despite Bobby Cruise announcing them in between falls. And I am getting really tired of Jimmy Jacobs vs everyone who used to be in the Age of the Fall. And on another note, what a crappy group, no one ever stays! Jacobs is the only left from the original quartet of himself, Black, Necro, and Lacey. Delirious was added on and his now out with the group now standing as Jacobs, Brodie Lee, occasionally MsChif, and occasionally Alison Wonderland. And what the hell is with Aries new gimmick? I get the change in attire and attitude, but there is no rule out there that says if you change your gimmick you suddenly forget how to wrestle! It’s cheap heat!
The show picked up steam in the second half with the mystery tag partner match which pitted Bison Smith accompanied by Prince Nana and Dirty Ernie Osiris and the returning Crown Jewel of the Embassy Jimmy Rave against American Dragon Bryan Danielson and the returning Colt “Boom Boom” Cabana. This match really got the crowd into the show as people popped huge for Jimmy’s return and even bigger for the return of Cabana.
D-Lo Brown vs. Jay Briscoe deflated the crowd again as no one was into Brown’s NYC debut and the match was a really crappy one to boot. The no DQ tag title match got people back into things but left me scratching my head. Steen was clearly injured going into the match and yet they didn’t move the belts off them. Hopefully we don’t head into a situation where again the tag champs were injured and they had a chance to move the belts in a match, chose not to, and then stripped them of the belts and had a tournament. I do not want that nonsense again.
We then got Nigel vs. KENTA for the ROH World Title and Nigel came in with his arm heavily taped up. Throughout the match it was terribly obvious that Nigel was really, legitimately injured. I can see why they didn’t move the belt here though; KENTA is a NOAH wrestler, on loan to ROH and cannot be counted on for consistent appearances. However, I do see the belt coming off Nigel sooner rather than later as I believe he is going to need surgery on his often injured arm.
Post show Bob and I headed off to our usual post show meal at the beloved Tick Tock Diner. We discussed Bob’s upcoming move, my trip to Ireland, some funny stories about my past and are doubts about ROH’s current direction under Booker Adam Pearce. As always it was a great time chatting it up with Bob and I look forward to our next show together.
Upon making it back into Penn Station I ran into my old buddy Vujeyva who I know through a friend’s younger brother. I often bump into him at shows as he is a fellow ROH fan. We asked each other what train we were on and when I realized his train was a half hour later than mine, to go to a town 5 minutes away from mine, I offered for him to hop on my train with me and I would give him a ride back to his car. He took me up on the offer and we spent the time conversing about ROH, other wrestling, music, what everyone from the “Group” had been up to, work, and other various topics. It was cool not to take the train by myself for once and I really enjoyed chatting it up with him.
I got home at 1:30 AM, took some Nyquil, and passed out until Erin woke me at 1 PM on Sunday afternoon. She offered repeatedly to take Lyric to the circus on her own but I just couldn’t do that to Lyric. I dragged my ass out of bed and into the shower and got myself dressed. Then Erin informed me that the night before Luke had gotten to one of my all time favorite albums, Ritual De Lo Habitual by Jane’s Addiction. I was completely incensed at this point. Erin blockaded the CD and DVD cases with chairs and a vacuum before we left and then it was off to the circus!
The circus was, well the circus. This is the second time we went in two years and I have to say, it doesn’t do anything for me and I would really not rather go anymore. I would also rather they not subject animals to the bull shit that they do. Both these circus trips have been through the Girl Scouts as I would not have sought to go otherwise.
After the circus we met up with my Mom at the Fred Robster for dinner (Richard Jenni fans will get this) and had an enjoyable meal as a family. Afterwards we dropped Lyric off at her mother’s and headed back home. Thus ending my way too busy a weekend for someone with a ridiculously bad sinus cold.
Before I sign off on this way too long blog, those of you who have been hounding me for an entry have now gotten what you asked for, I thought I would hit on one more thing. I received Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance as a Christmas gift from one of the doctors I work for. I have just recently been able to start reading the book as I received so many books for Christmas this year. And let me tell you, when you have a 90 minute commute to and from work each day, books are always a welcome present! This book can at times be a harrowing read and there have been several instances when I have had to put it down and just focus on the music on my iPod as my head has been spinning a bit. I have to say though; it has made me think of one of my favorite philosophical theories. That is that no man can stand in the same river twice, as both the man and the river are in a constant state of flux. The river will never be the same, and neither will the man.
I often think of the past, way more than I probably should, and change. We may look back on good times we had and good friends we share them with and these friends may no longer be a part or as big a part of our lives as they once were. We should not look back at this with sorrow but with joy at remembering the times we had. We must also remember that we are not that person anymore and neither are they. We should not constantly lament that they may no longer be in our lives but just enjoy the fact that they once were and the times we had with them. Times change, people come and go, but memories last forever.
Thanks for listening to me ramble again.
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